Deja vu

Today's massage was NO JOKE. Whoa. The practitioner was blind, and strong as hell. It reminded me of when I went for a shiatsu session in Chicago, which was so intense that I started running a fever on the ride home and then was sick for days b/c so many toxins were let loose (and b/c I was not used to that kind of bodywork). She pinpointed some eerie things and in general was horrified by the state of my body. I wonder if this is why I go so infrequently; b/c I hate the reminders of how hard I am on my body.

It was so depressing! She said, you only become an idiot by withstanding this kind of pain. It made me want to book a ticket home, or away to anywhere, since I can't see at all how I could possibly change my lifestyle in Seoul for my last month quickly and effectively enough to make a real difference. The message I got today was this: everything I am doing now is bad for me, and everything I am not doing now is good for me. Hm...this was more than enough to spur me to rush home, crawl into bed, and stay there for a good portion of the day. I did some work, read a little, took two naps, and listened to "Edelweiss" (likely in an attempt to reenter my 10-yo body and escape this one).

During my year here, I've become increasingly bad at including notices of my work in shows. I just remembered that this one is up in Spain until Monday. Time to do some pushups!