Monday, June 04, 2012

Sweet surprise

Before I forget: I have a couple of hanji teacups in this show opening near Detroit this Friday. Jacklyn invited me to participate, which was a treat b/c she wanted my woven hanji things. If I hadn't been SO crazed in that time slot, I would have sent more artwork. But these will suffice. This morning, after a late salon last night (you know how people start drinking and loosening up and then suddenly 5-7 min presentations turn into 20 min ones?), I got up to start the week. Went to the music building to practice violin AND piano, which made me grateful to my parents for providing me so many ways of expressing myself. I am fortunate to be able to play musical instruments, draw, write, speak (in more than one language), and so on. So the idea of the short playing sessions each morning being like prayer is apt. I thought last night about seventh grade, when I was taught how to pray in CCD. I completely forget the steps (there was a mnemonic device that fails me now) but they were straightforward. Even though I was a half-hearted Catholic, I prayed. It involved assessing the day to pick out the good things and to apologize for the bad, being grateful for the good, and asking for help with challenges. In talking yesterday to Marci, I realized that maybe this residency is not at all about making a wonderful new body of work. I am meeting some very old challenges and this place is a lab where maybe I can come up with new ways of reacting, new ways of being in the world that are less self-destructive.
After practicing, I went with Vagner to the gym and then came back to submit an application, shower and make lunch, run to the post office, and get groceries. The skies had turned ominous and when I got back, I felt super sleepy and then was surprised to already be rejected. I guess it's good to know sooner than later, but a turnaround of a few hours? That doesn't feel good. I tried to nap twice, once on a table in my studio and once in bed, but gave up and went to look for mail. Vagner saw me and said I had a package. I figured it was headphones I had ordered, but no--it was something huge from Oberlin. I almost cried when I opened it.

My students from the Oberlin papermaking workshop I taught in April had made a big thank you on a sheet of paper someone had made in class! The comments were so thoughtful and kind, and it seemed like they really had gotten what I wanted them to get out of the class. This drawing especially touched me. TOO SWEET!

 It erased all of my afternoon haze and crankiness from immediate rejection. So I got back to my comic subscription and finally made a new choose your own adventure one. Of course, it's all about the drama I have been battling (mostly in my head). So that is done, and feels good. The only thing left on my to do list is to weave the chamber pot. I have another big app to do but I'll wait until later. It's not urgent. Not as urgent as re-reading multicolored thanks penned by fifteen hands.

1 comment:

Velma Bolyard said...

what great students!

i think you are learning to trust your own adventure.