Thursday, January 25, 2007

Kicking into high gear

Well, it's finally happening. Roko helped me drag in most of the huge garbage bag full of wood chips and shavings from her sculpting (she is carving from four butternut logs). I stayed up way too late at a private party in my bedroom, adjacent to the painters' party in the living room. James, Aidan, Ching-In, and I talked until 2am-ish and I think Ching-In exorcised the can't sleep demons from my bed. I didn't get enough sleep, but dragged myself to breakfast for the first time in days, and then got James, Laura, Chrissy, and Sang Gyun to help me drag all the bags from the shop to the studio upstairs.

This is what happened after I unbagged all of the wood scraps. I'm trying not to think about what hell it will be to clean up this stuff, bag it up again, and bring it downstairs so that the office can burn it all in their wood stove. I found an old typewriter in the studio, which rocks, since I want to call this piece "retire" or something like that. Retiring from the typewriter/violin thing. A last hurrah. I tried to air the room out b/c it smells like paint. I'm hoping the wood will scent it some. It's really fragrant in Roko's studio, and I love that smell. I love that the typewriter is an Underwood.

So, my morning work felt really gratifying and I just felt so much at home and in my skin preparing an installation and performance. At lunch, James asked if I have a big plan in my mind or if I just go w/whatever moves me in the space. I said, both. It was really hard, in a way, to work there, b/c I kept thinking, "what will so-and-so think, and this other person, and him, and her, and and and..." Then I'd have to stop myself and remind myself that this is for ME. That I want to make a space that I feel good in, that honors myself as I really know that person, and that creates positive energy so that I can have some kind of closure on my time here. So it's all about trusting myself, and knowing which parts of myself to trust (like, not trusting the mean voices in my head).

I broke out my leather gloves for the first time since I got here, and as I was all up in the wood, pushing it w/my hands and kicking w/my feet (shovels and rakes are overrated). Then, I saw what I had written on them when I first got them in Nebraska, and I laughed. I'm glad I wrote those things, b/c I really need to read them now, and remember. OH! I got a great package from Gili today that Nicole brought to me, w/vitamins and tea and emergen-c. Office work was hell (data entry) and my nap wouldn't take, but I got microwave popcorn to replace Laura's that I burned and ate last night, and soon it will be dark enough for me to go back and see how the space looks/feels at night. Since this will be a nighttime performance.


Paulettasaurus said...

Aimee--those kind of typewriters are still in use here in the Phil! Crazy, huh? Even the job applications ask whether you can type, and if so , if you use manual or electric.

I love the wood chips. Your room looks a lot cuter than mine.

Gili Warsett said...

I adore the spiral with the wood chips. Are all sculptors obsessed with spirals? That feels like a big theme.

Anonymous said...

Aimee, i love your energy!!!!!!! ... it is just wonderful when you embrace and what you embrace and the magic that happens, and all your focusing and discoveries in between!!!,I love your awareness and sensitivity about smell. You hauling chips into the studio reminds me of the installation at a gallery at massart where i wheel barrowed in a few yards of dirt into the gallery. bringing outside into inside, yipee !!! it would be fun to meet up and perform together someday flow -che