Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Hard vs not hard

Jami noted yesterday that I like to put myself in hard situations. I'm not sure why I am always surprised when I hear this, but asked my sister today and she confirmed it. Her theory is that I got bad information in college from a ridiculous boy about how I haven't "suffered" enough in my life so I fell into the trap and made life harder for myself on purpose.

But I can't conceive of how I could make my life less hard, without major sacrifices to my personal fulfillment. Today was a big admin day, which is always gross, but then I finally rolled up work and made floor space and laid down the plastic sheeting and inked up. I realized as I ground ink why it's good for me to do this kind of labor: it's the only thing that reduces drama. Inner drama, that is.

So now that about eight big sheets of hanji are inked and six are glued together, it's time to curl up w/a book before I get back at it.

They're turning off the WATER tomorrow from 8am to 5pm (I still am baffled by why this is even allowed), so I've been thinking all day about fasting and collecting water in the bathtub. I keep thinking about the 5-gallon condensed milk buckets from Rebecca in grad school from the bakery she worked at years ago that I had to give up in one of many moves. I would love to have them now.

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