Saturday, September 09, 2006

Baking soda hurts

RAINY DAY. It's been raining ALL DAY. Steady rain, and sometimes hard. I woke up to it early in the morning. I have a couple pots on the floor, but all the leaks travel. I just have to make sure the crucial things don't get wet (like my computer & artwork). I went to the mailbox twice today and got bitten on my face both times. I tried to put baking soda on my face, but no one told me how much that stings! Damn. I also tried to make the most of being out in the hunting boots that Ed let me wear in the rain (narrow so the English landed gentry could fit them in stirrups), and went to the garden to get some mint. I was walking away and wondered why it felt like something was moving in my hand. I looked down to see a squirming green worm, freaked out, dropped everything, and then ran away. But decided I couldn't just come back empty handed, so I went back and carefully picked more mint as the bugs buzzed all over my face. I looked at some more art, too, that I still hadn't got to in the field. But man, there are bugs for all kinds of days, and bugs still love rainy weather. So I ran back.

All I want to do is lay around, watch movies, and eat donuts. I can't do the last two things, and laying around in my bed today would feel like laying in the back seat of a car - that's how it feels w/all the rain on the windows and roof. Instead, I've been completely zoned out online all day. I have nothing to show for myself. But other people do: right after posting yesterday, I got the BEST package from Gili: an autumn double-CD mix in a custom sleeve!!! I was so . You know? It was perfect, and timed perfectly. I've been listening to all the music over and over since last night, nonstop. And I had been thinking for a long time about how I needed new music! Yay. The only three songs I already had were from Josh Ritter, PJ Harvey, and Lucinda Williams. And I love all of those songs.

Oh, and I got accepted by another residency! But now I'm getting a little torn. I kind of want to just be a regular working person, but I keep getting these residencies, and feel like I shouldn't take them. Argh. I'll call on Monday and get details about exactly when and all that fun stuff. I'm also feeling less and less excited about moving to California. I seem to be reverting back to my old fantasies of living on my own private island (this is a fantasy from when I was probably not even ten). In the meantime, it's cold and I'm fearful that my allergies are now a cold. Hard to say. Still eating lots of peanut butter as I dodge dripping water.

4 comments:

  1. that picture is beautiful. looks like an old jewish photo of someone correcting the torah. i love the light. do you like the rain? is it not that simple?
    i remember after graduating, i was living in the bay area and i was standing in line at starbucks looking at one of their mix cds. that was the first time i saw josh ritter's name on a real-deal kind of thing. he's so good about sticking to what he wants to do.
    where is the next residency?
    where in california are you moving? a desert island sounds great after an over-stimluating week in nyc... i feel like i'm inside of a television in someone's bedroom in the middle of the country/middle of the night like one of those spooky programs that channels air at four in the morning. that's what ny feels like right now.

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  2. it sounds exciting-- and there is that stupid saying whereever you go there you are: nabraska, california, home, chicago, japan. you know thins. the dripping watter is poetic and symbolic of life isn't it? you are meticulous.

    the stuff i sent you isn't that exciting, but it's better than nothing.

    I LOVE LOVE LOVE Josh ritter. is he still around? last i saw him was in providence r.I. weird.

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  3. the picture is at night, w/candlelight, of me transcribing my meditation study. it's crazy hard work, but when i take it in little pieces, it's okay.

    the rain is...i love the rain, but it brings so many things! all the bugs love to then come inside and hang w/me. i didn't like having pools of brown water all over me that i was afraid of stepping in or knocking over or slipping on (there was a big plastic tarp laid out on the bottom of the stairs from my bedroom to catch a leak). and now everything is just damp. but it's good b/c it keeps things warmer (i just learned this a.m. that it's b/c moisture in the air holds heat).

    i know. it's crazy about josh ritter. i love his stuff and hadn't known he was still at it (i had seen his stuff at a tower records in westchester years ago), but when my friend githa (also from oberlin) was dying from cancer, i went to visit her and sent an email to her friends in chicago in case they wanted me to bring anything to her, and a couple got in touch w/me and the guy was roommates w/josh so they sent me along w/a card and his "hello starling" album and when i arrived i played it for her on her computer. or mine. i forget. i hadn't heard any of the stuff before. she died the next night, and i had emailed a little w/josh and his manager (darius? another obie, was expecting his first kid at the time), about how shook up josh was about it all. and then i went w/the couple to see josh in concert in chicago at schubas and saw him afterwards and talked to him about her a little. he's still very sweet, a lot skinnier (like ALL of us), very high energy.

    the residency i just heard from is in illinois, very close to chicago: ragdale.

    i'm not sure about the moving anywhere, but where i wanted was the bay area. san francisco.

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  4. While you were writing your entry, I was watching the same rain only maybe three hours apart (weather-wise)and celebrating my soggy birthday.

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