Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Back in the fold

Ah, how slippery the slope is. I just had more red wine tonight. Now I've officially lost track of how much I've been drinking in the past week and a half. When did school end? Alex and Josie were very generous and sweet to take me out to dinner for doing their wedding invites for them this summer. The waiter forgot Alex's coffee and then we exchanged strange looks - he thought I needed something and I thought he needed something so we mirrored the same expression. It was so good to talk to Alex again b/c he has this hilarious way of seeing things that I would NEVER get to in a million years. There was something about seeing a bad situation as a potentially very good one...trying to remember...about meeting people who could help me...well, there it goes. My previously unrivaled photographic memory is failing me again.

Which reminds me! For a while, at least a month, I had been plagued by an image of this girl's face. I kept seeing her face: tiny features, pale, eastern European, dark brown hair, timid. And I couldn't remember for the longest time where it came from. I finally figured it out a few weeks ago: she was a 2nd violinist in the youth orchestra I used to manage in Newark! The one w/the last name I could never spell out w/o referring to my handy Access database. I'm not sure why she was haunting me. Anyhow, I saw another woman on the train today who I ALSO swear I knew, but again can't even come close to putting a finger on. Just no idea at all.

I met Tomoko today after my cranio-sacral session (more on that in a minute) and we had arranged to meet at the *bucks down the block from me b/c I couldn't figure out what coffee place she was trying to describe. Hilariously enough, she walked me straight back to my building: she meant the wine bar there! I was like, "Tomoko, I LIVE here!!" She was like, but it's a hotel!! Hahaaaa. Yes, it's true. Sooo much like a hotel.

But besides my morning's productiveness in the studio (more on THAT in a minute), the most euphoric part of today was at my c-s session. We devoted it to working on my jaw issues and it was AMAZING. He started w/c-s treatments to calm my jaw down, which was extremely agitated. Then he put his finger into my mouth to do trigger point therapy - I had to relay the pain on a scale of 1-10 w/my fingers. It was kind of scary, but then also incredible b/c I could feel the muscles reacting and tensing up but then letting go. Then he did orthopedic massage on the three sets of muscles on both sides of my head that affect the jaw, and then more c-s work on my pelvis and ears. That was ultra-weird b/c he just put his fingers in my ears while holding my head and it was kind of nice - like someone blocking the outside world from me. It made me think of when I was little and thought of morbid things like, "would I rather be blind or deaf?" [I always picked blind. Good old Little House on the Prairie]. So afterwards, he explained to me that the pelvic bones are supposed to move during treatment: open and close. But mine were stuck open. The temporal bones that cover the ears mimic the pelvic bones, so they were ALSO open, putting pressure on the jaw. AMAZING!!! It reminds me of how Dearbhla talked in yoga about the jaw and hips being connected. I think it was her...anyhow, still SO amazing. I have renewed faith again in this bodywork. Well, I always do, but it falters most when I open my checkbook to pay for it. Today was incredible. I felt great coming out of session.

So - the other exciting part of the daytime: I laid out my bricks to get a sense of how they fit into the gallery space. They are SO FUNNY!!! Obviously, I need to work on making a billion more, but still - aren't they so compelling, even at just less than 30?? I also shot my little zine from early this year and took my marshmallow comic home to figure out how to affix it to paper better than the duct tape rolls I have right now.

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